butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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