Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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