Jerry, you need to find god
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
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