We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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