I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
