after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Holy shit dude........stairs
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
