so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Randomize
