he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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