Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
