its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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