your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
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