I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
