so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
