She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
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