no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
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