I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
