Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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