that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
