This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
