I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
