he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Randomize
