Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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