This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
