True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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