TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
