They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
