Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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