I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
i think my cat just said my name.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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