I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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