i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
