I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
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