Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
