Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(732): View more from New Jersey

pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.

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(248): View more from Michigan

so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

You're barking up the wrong lesbian.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again

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(402): View more from Nebraska

On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.

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(420): View more from

Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.

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(440): View more from Ohio

I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...

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(716): View more from New York

I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.

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(360): View more from Washington

I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.

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