i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
