So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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