I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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