Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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