yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
