butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
