i think my mom watched the whole time
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
