And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
