That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
