Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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