Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
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