So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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