Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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