I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
