i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
