I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Drunk is not a location!
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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