it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
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